Book Review (Brave Inked Emotions compiled by Roma Gupta Sinha) & Interview (Prisha Lalwani)

Book Review

About the book:

Emotions are beautiful but are also very powerful. They can uplift us at one moment but can sink us really deep the very next. Every coming generation seems to be getting weaker and weaker in handling their emotions and it is heart-breaking to see so many succumbing to suicide or mental health failure. To us not only our emotions are extremely vital but also of our loved ones and each one of us devices his or her own techniques to fare better when thrown out of our comfort zone and I guess experience teaches us the most about how to secure our emotional wellness.

So here is a delve into 31 soulful life experiences of eminent Indian writers of how life taught them precious lessons on emotional strength which someone in a similar boat can use as a guiding light to deal better. You can read an unimaginable range of true stories here right from a young bride’s exemplary resilience to a wheelchair-ridden young girl’s biography. There’s a counselor giving her heart and soul to her student and there’s a destiny’s chosen child stumbling and weaving back life at every step in life and many many more. They all will touch your soul like never before, giving you precious lessons on emotional wellness.

Presented by Roma Gupta Sinha:

This book has been conceptualized, edited and compiled by Roma Gupta  Sinha. This is her eighth book targeting women empowerment in India. She loves to lead a life with a strong purpose and is an acclaimed writer who has won the coveted ‘Woman of the Year’ Award in 2015 for her writings on Women Empowerment, Equality, Rights and Liberation on her blog and the prestigious ‘Planet’s Pride Award 2018’

Genre: Personal Essays/Motivational/Non-Fiction
Pages: 250
Format: eBook/Paperback
Price (as on Amazon):

• Paperback (available only on Amazon India): ₹293
• Kindle eBook: ₹187.95/$4.99

My Rating: 4.1/5

An inspiring read and definitely one you can recall or keep going back to during the tough phases of life. Each story herein teaches us how to deal with our emotions and how one can bounce back from challenges that life throws our way, be it professional or personal.

What I liked about the book:

• Despite being a non-fiction book and personal essays book, the chapters/stories have a story-telling element which would work for fiction lovers (like it did for me)
• The tips, tricks and suggestions which have been given out in each story, are drawn out of personal and sometimes tragic experiences, which makes the advice meted out, doubly authentic and something readers can rely on.
• These are the things I liked about each individual contributor’s story and what my key takeaways from them were:
  – I Never Gave Up by Harjeet Kaur : How to find joys in life despite multiple and repeated personal tragedies and health ailments
  – Magically I Got Up Every Time I Fell by Roma Gupta Sinha : Why self-acceptance is important and how and why I need to pamper myself
  – Life, Wheels And More by Leha Divakar : Embracing disability with a smile and a never-give up attitude
  – I Was Losing Myself When I Was Losing Him by Dr. Preeti Chauhan : Why we must not forget to take care of ourselves while taking care of those we love
  – Accepting and Helping a Toxic Parent by Prisha Lalwani : How parents can have a -ve impact on a child’s mental and emotional well-being and why we need to understand/accept that parents can also be wrong at times
  – Giving a Young Adult a Safe Space by Aesha Shah : How we can go out of our (professional) way to help someone find their answers
  – The Path of Healing by Ambica Gulati: How our parents’ pass on their traits to us, the good as well as the bad
  – Finding a Sense of Harmony by Swarnali Nath : How mental health can affect us and come knocking down our doors, without warning
  – Books Healed My Mind, Body, and Soul by Ritu Bindra : Why everyone needs to adapt and embrace the habit of reading
  – Eighteen Trips around the Sun by Sakshi Bindra : How to deal with children during different ages/ age-groups
  – A Teen’s Healing Journey by Cindy D’silva: How we can deal with negative emotions
  – The Backbone of My Life by Varsha Bagadia : Why we need to give space and independence to our parents (if they ask for it), even after a tragedy
  – How I Deal With Emotional Turmoil by Noor Anand Chawla : How psychotherapy and speaking to an expert can help
  – Away from My Motherland by Dr. Surbhi Prapanna : Probably the most relatable one for me because of NRI status. I loved how the author is honest about the difficulties of life in a foreign land and how one can handle/overcome the challenges
  – The Golden Years of my Life by Neerja Bhatnagar : A practical guide on life after retirement
  – An Incident That Shook My Soul by Janaki Srinivasan : How to communicate with kids in a manner that safeguards their mental and emotional health
  – The Transformative Discovery by Abha Singh : Why we need to confront and be upfront with those who caused us stress
  – My Pillar of Support in PPD by Pooja Jha : How family can be our pillars of strength during our bad phase
  – The Final Blow by Monidipa Dutta : How a life-threatening experience can be a blessing in disguise
  – Fixing the Fragile Mental Well-Being of GenZ by Aditi Kapur : Relatable and easy to follow tips for parents of GenZ
  – Dismantling the Stigma around Men’s Emotional Health by Anjali Upadhyay : How a father taught a daughter that men can be emotional too
  – My Mom, The Power in Me by Roma Gupta Sinha : How mothers always know best, even in their passing
  – Let’s Ease the Pressure on Our Little Precious by Cindy D’Silva : An example-based guide which is one of the best from the parenting stories in the book
  – My Battle with Emotional Eating by Ishieta Chopra : How it teaches tackling of emotional eating, without being judgy or overbearing
  – Taming My Anger by Rakhi Jayashankar : How anger can be channelized in a positive and productive manner
  – Motherhood Taught Me This by Sindhu Vinod Narayan : Useful information and tips on nurturing emotional wellness in children
  – My Emotional Anchor by Rakhi Mangala Parsai : A father’s lessons for a daughter and the world at large
  – Dealing with My Demons by Sukaina Majeed : How someone’s seemingly good intentions can be guised and can cause you mental/emotional harm
  – Don’t Judge a Child By His Grades by Anjali Upadhyay : Teaches not to judge students or pressurize them for good grades
  – Our Sisterhood Always Conquers by MeenalSonal : Teaches us how collaborative work/working as a team is possible and fruitful in the blogging sphere
  – Pure Love Teaches Acceptance by Samata Dey Bose: A perfect one to end the book on a high note by saving one of the best for the last. This one teaches how one can deal with their parents during disagreements and also how to tackle one’s complicated/problematic dynamic with their in-laws.

What I did not like about the book:

• Some of the stories, despite the best intentions, come off as preachy. The helpful material/guide therein also felt like something I could easily find via a simple Google search on the topic; or something I could access on a blog post with that subject in focus. This felt more off-putting for me personally because I do not enjoy reading self-help and that’s also a reason I stay away from non-fiction self help books. But if you’re someone who enjoys the genre, this would be right up your alley.
• Quite a few stories are around and about parenting and since I’m not a parent I found myself skipping or fast-reading the pages which had parenting content. The same could also be a -ve for readers like me who don’t have children or are as yet single and/or a young adult.

Quotable quotes:

• Emotions are beautiful but are also very powerful. They can uplift us at one moment but can drown us really deep the very next. (Preface by Roma Gupta Sinha)
• Each one of us has several untold stories hidden in our hearts which often fade away, buried deep in dark crevices therein, but if told these tales can serve as a worthy ‘Eureka’ for mankind. (Preface by Roma Gupta Sinha)
• When you lose someone you cherish, you gain the strength to face anything.
• There is great solace in helping others. (I Never Gave Up by Harjeet Kaur)
• We can’t endlessly keep talking about our pain to our spouse or friends or anyone as not only they may get bored and consider us attention seekers, but also, our constantly repeating it to ourselves may make us feel more miserable. (Magically I Got Up Every Time I Fell by Roma Gupta Sinha)
• Everything in life that we may think of as hurdles could actually turn out to be an opportunity for adventure (Life, Wheels And More by Leha Divakar)
• True peace arises not from the absence of suffering, but from the acceptance of life’s impermanence(I Was Losing Myself When I Was Losing Him by Dr. Preeti Chauhan)
• We tend to remember the harsh memories and words very easily – however, the pleasant ones need to be reminded to us (Accepting and Helping a Toxic Parent by Prisha Lalwani)
• Focusing solely on earnings from a job shouldn’t be the primary driver in choosing a career. When monetary benefits become the sole motivation, students may make incorrect choices regarding their courses and colleges (Giving a Young Adult a Safe Space by Aesha Shah)
• How experience and express emotions is a result of both nature and nurture: your genetic legacy and the myriad experiences you live through, starting from the moment of your birth (The Path of Healing by Ambica Gulati)
• Every new has its own sets of fears and confusions (Finding a Sense of Harmony by Swarnali Nath)
• Seeing life pass you by when you know you have the potential for so much more is a horrible feeling (Books Healed My Mind, Body, and Soul by Ritu Bindra)
• There are things in life that require deferred gratification, but in many cases, it is not a matter of our means; it is a matter of making the time and changing our priorities. Sometimes it also means disregarding societal norms and stepping outside of our comfort zone (Eighteen Trips around the Sun by Sakshi Bindra)
• Solving doesn’t only mean solving a problem that is stressing you out. We have to be the Sherlock Holmes of our emotions. We tend to find a solution to stop the pain caused due to to the negative build-up. We have to find a way to discourage our negative emotions (A Teen’s Healing Journey by Cindy D’silva)
• Loss is a curious thing. Everyone feels it at some point but the way we experience and react to it is personal. The idiom ‘sailing in the same boat’ encapsulates an entirely unique set of meanings (The Backbone of My Life by Varsha Bagadia)
• Perhaps one of the easiest ways to follow for dealing with emotional turmoil is through mild forms of escapism. Find a hobby to lose yourself in when you feel particularly low. Find a hobby that aligns with your personality (How I Deal With Emotional Turmoil by Noor Anand Chawla)
• If you are struggling with any kind of emotional or mental health issues, then find a passion in your life. When we wake up with a sense of purpose in our life, then it brings a sense of responsibility and motivation towards life (Away from My Motherland by Dr. Surbhi Prapanna)
• Engaging in creative pursuits such as painting, writing, or playing music can also be a powerful way to express emotions and foster emotional expression (The Golden Years of my Life by Neerja Bhatnagar)
• Most people think that emotional health and mental health are one and the same, but there is a huge difference. While sound mental health regulates how we think, decide, and manage tough situations, emotional well-being, on the other hand, helps you regulate feelings and emotions. And yes, the two are different (An Incident That Shook My Soul by Janaki Srinivasan)
• Accepting mistakes and being open to change paves the path for personal growth. Being receptive to feedback, however challenging, is crucial (The Transformative Discovery by Abha Singh)
• We all need at least one friend, one who can listen to us patiently, not judge us, and give genuine advice and support us when we are feeling like falling apart (My Pillar of Support in PPD by Pooja Jha)
• Life can be like a big adventure with ups and downs. Mental trauma and feelings can be like tricky monsters on this journey. But remember, you’re the hero of your story. It’s okay to feel sad or confused sometimes, and it’s okay to ask for help (The Final Blow by Monidipa Dutta)
• Social media and technology play a role in significant changes in mental health, but these changes are not always negative (Fixing the Fragile Mental Well-Being of GenZ by Aditi Kapur)
• Strength isn’t silence; dismantling the stigma around men’s emotional health begins with speaking up and seeking support. Let’s turn up the volume on men’s mental health and break the stigma with the powerful tune of positivity (Dismantling the Stigma around Men’s Emotional Health by Anjali Upadhyay)
• Emotional wellness has an important arm in being financially self-dependent as male supremacy and dominance stem from them being the primary earner in an Indian household ( My Mom, The Power in Me by Roma Gupta Sinha)
• We should not believe what others tell us about someone else, whether it is about their family member, friend or enemy. Especially when the information is something bad (Let’s Ease the Pressure on Our Little Precious by Cindy D’Silva)
• One needs to be strong, and strategic to overcome the habit of emotional eating. especially as one has to make a constant and conscious decision every day, every time your hand strays to that plate or packet of anything edible (My Battle with Emotional Eating by Ishieta Chopra)
• The first step into anger management is to acknowledge that being angry is normal. Your expression of anger depends on the person at the receiving end (Taming My Anger by Rakhi Jayashankar)
• Books can be a very good medium to understand emotional wellness (Motherhood Taught Me This by Sindhu Vinod Narayan)
• True wealth lies not in what we accumulate, but in what we give (My Emotional Anchor by Rakhi Mangala Parsai)
• If a person you had started maintaining distance from suddenly becomes too sweet, identify it. Putting your finger on their sudden change is that this change is for their benefit. They are bothered. They aren’t sweet because they want to find out how you are doing. They want to figure out why you aren’t given them importance anymore. ( Dealing with My Demons by Sukaina Majeed)
• When people talk about kids nowadays, they often mention how, in the past, kids were better behaved, but now they seem to lack manners. But have you ever wondered whose job it is to teach them good habits? (Don’t Judge a Child By His Grades by Anjali Upadhyay)
• Trust, that delicate yet powerful element, is continuously nurtured through our shared experiences, transparent communication, and a deep understanding of each other’s emotional landscapes. This foundation of trust becomes a safe harbor where emotional well-being not only survives but thrives too (Our Sisterhood Always Conquers by MeenalSonal)
• The concept of giving space in relationships is very important to make relations healthy. We should respect each other as individuals without being competitive. Maintaining emotional wellness is in our hands. One needs to remain vocal about the needs and expectations and value the same for other relations in life (Pure Love Teaches Acceptance by Samata Dey Bose)

Book purchase links:

• NotionPress
• Amazon

Compiler/Editor social media links:

• Goodreads
• Website
• Twitter
• Facebook

Instagram Live interview with Rom Gupta Sinha:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Manali Desai (A Rustic Mind) (@arusticmind_)

Here’s a look at all the contributing authors of Brave Inked Emotions

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Interview with Prisha Lalwani

About Prisha Lalwani (text taken from the author bio in Brave Inked Emotions):

Prisha Lalwani, the master multitasker, went from decoding corporate chaos to juggling life with her mischievous twins. With a Counseling Psychology degree in one hand and a diaper in the other, she traded her office swivel chair for a front-row seat to the chaos of motherhood. From employee relations maverick to content queen, she now reigns over Google’s first page with her witty articles. Her eBook ‘The Cheese Burst Arranged Marriage’, is a delightful blend of matrimonial chaos and diary drama. On social media, they call her Mummasauruss, where she spills the beans on parenting with a with a side of humor- which makes her work relatable and enjoyable.

Prisha’s story from the book is titled Accepting and Helping a Toxic Parent. It is a heart touching story of a daughter forgiving her toxic parent (mother) and getting her professional help. Here’s my interview with her where we talk about her story, how it helped her heal, what was her experience like being a part of this anthology, and much more.

Q: What made you pick this story/anecdote/topic for Brave Inked Emotions?

A: When I got to know that there is an emotion based anthology that is being made I wanted to write about how parents specially mothers were revered as the ideal kind of parent. Their unconditional love and all of that, how it can all be toxic. I wanted to share my personal journey towards changing that for me. How I took therapy to overcome it and how I helped my mother to overcome the obstacles that she has faced as a very young and hassled mother. I felt like my story could help more people feel related to it and realize that yes this can happen with anyone and it is not a specific case. I used to feel for a very long time that I am the only one who is going through such feelings and that other people and children don’t rebel so badly. So I used to feel very isolated because of that but now I know that a lot of people relate with that story and understand that this can happen with anyone and it is possible.

Q: What was the most challenging bit for you while writing your story and how did you overcome it?

A: The most challenging part was to not judge myself. A lot of times I feel that I am being judged, if by no one else, then by myself. I feel like I have taken things too harshly. Maybe my mother wasn’t that harsh, or maybe I was way too sensitive. People face so much in life and they go on with it normally, where as my troubles are so small in comparison to all the terrible things people have gone through. So I felt I do not want others to judge my feelings. It also felt like a turtle was being taken out of its protective shell. I felt that whatever little popularity I have with my social media presence, my followers and readers will know something that makes me very vulnerable and open. Writing this story was like sharing my insides out into the world and honestly, it still scares me a bit.

Q: You’ve put a disclaimer at the end of your story saying that your mother isn’t to be blamed or be tagged as a bad parent for your mental health issues. Why did you feel the need to do that?

A: I have seen my mother as a third person also. There were so many times, which I realized later, that she didn’t want to say or do those harsh things. She did not want to punish me but basically she wanted to have an outlet for her own difficulties in life. She was at the bottom of the hierarchy at her in-laws place, and after I was born I was the one who came below her. So she became second last in the hierarchy.
I was the only person she could vent out on or the person that she had any bit of control on. So nobody told her how to deal with things or how to express her anger, frustration and pain in a better way. I wrote this disclaimer because I wanted people to know that she cannot be held completely in the wrong because she did not know better. She loved me with anything and everything she had even when she had her own methods of dealing with her own pain. So there was a disclaimer so that neither she nor I be judged for our actions but just an alignment of incidents that shaped our lives in a certain way.

Q: Can you share an incident from the recent years when you’ve been able to reconcile and create a healthier bond with your mother?

A: Everything in today’s date is reconciled. We don’t meet-up that frequently because we are in different cities and because now I am married and have my own family. So we meet for around 8 to 10 days in a year and it goes pretty smoothly. She can’t stop doting enough on me; anything and everything I wish for even, or if I don’t, she has it presented and available for me. I mean she is a crazy-in- love -with- her -daughter kind of a mother. Also she is lesser in stress now because her children have grown up and they aren’t as distracting and troublesome. She has settled down, more like calmed down in life, and things are a bit in her control. She has found solace in religious activities that keep her happily busy. In fact, I’m more of a motherly figure for her, scolding her and taking care of her. I get to boss her around. She calls me her teacher, her guru, and we have a cordial relationship. She is fun and peppy, and I have a great time talking to her or spending time with her.

Q: Share an anecdote in the making or post-release phase of Brave Inked Emotions that stands out for you

A: My mom was visiting me once. She is almost always proud of me now, but one day she was stressed out about certain things a few extended family members had said. In order to soothe herself, she started to insult me and added my siblings to the list. I tried to calm her down but it kept on getting aggressive. She told me I’m a useless person with zero money making ability, wasting my time amounting to nothingness. It hurt me real bad, and I asked her if she hears what she says and if she means it. In anger she said yes, she meant everything. I walked out of the room and made myself busy, but I couldn’t stop thinking, “I’m 40 years old and I’m still a waste to her??!”
After a few hours, I calmed down. In the meantime we were still talking about here and there, just basic communication. Soon, it evened out and no one brought it up. Three days later, she apologised to me and cried and said she didn’t mean it. I was able to let it go, because I know she says extremely harsh things without meaning them. It stays in my mind as a crucial episode, but it doesn’t hurt me anymore because she apologised and realised. her mistake. I thought it was a wise decision to step out of the situation then and there, and not close the communication channels.

Q: Did you refer to any books or any study material/research you did for your story? What was it. Share your conception to the implementation process

A: As a writer, I’m a pathetic reader. I find it very hard to read any kind of material. In fact, it makes me feel that it pollutes my style of writing. This piece did not need any research since it was a true story. But my writing style is mostly just how I think. There’s no major strategy involved, except this:
A. Think and decide my topic
B. Think about patches of what is going to make up my piece- I keep that running in my head while I do my house chores etc.
C. Refine, or come up with certain liners/heading/title for the story
D. Sit down to write and finish in one go.
E. Read once for checks and edits.
F. Submit/upload.
I can’t read my own article many times. I just read it once for mistakes and send it to its destination.

Q: How was the experience of being part of this anthology? Did sharing your story help you heal or help in any manner in your emotional wellness journey?

A: The objective of sharing my story in the anthology was to have more people feel seen and heard. I wanted more people to feel that parents can be toxic and that they (parents) can be changed. You can have depression due to childhood traumas that aren’t “drastic traumas”. That part got me the success. Almost all the readers have sent messages, expressed thoughts and appreciated the story. It is truly humbling. But as stated, I feel exposed and vulnerable. I don’t feel like taking the credit, in fact I contemplated for long if I wanted my name in the list of authors or rather keep it as “anonymous”. I wanted people to know the story, but I don’t want them to discuss it with me. Like I don’t want to talk about it or elaborate on it too much. Somewhere I feel very touchy about it. I hope this gets better with time, but in a way, sharing did not decrease my vulnerability. To be honest, I feel more vulnerable now and it’s all about how I feel after sharing something so deeply guarded within me.

Q: What can we expect from you next, as a writer/author?

A: I’m participating in another anthology and hopefully, it will get published soon. I keep writing something fun and sometimes deep stuff on my Instagram and my blog, so that’s always ongoing. I am also keen on revising my first solo book ” The Cheese Burst Arranged Marriage” which is a really funny and ticklish book on how I met my husband in an arranged marriage setup (read it if you haven’t, I personally love that book). That’s what’s in the pipeline for now. Otherwise I’m a very spur-of-the-moment person , le jayein Jane kaha Hawaien

You can find out more about Prisha or reach out to her @mummasauruss

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I’m participating in Blogchatter’s #TBRChallenge.

This post is part of the Bookish League blog hop hosted by Bohemian Bibliophile.

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Thank you for reading.

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